Reality TV

If current trends on Survivor continue, we may have to re-write some old adages.  Survival of the fittest has become survival of the fattest.  So far in Micronesia only the weak survive.  Outwit, outplay, outlast?  More like out-sleep, out-laze, outcast.    So now, keeping in that tradition, here are the weakness rankings for the week (or is that weak?):

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1. Cirie-Nobody is better connected right now than Cirie.  Not only is she in an alliance with Ozzy and Amanda, she has new friends in Tracy, Ami and Chet.  Saving people from being voted out of the game will do that for you.
2. Ozzy-He’s still calling the shots at Malakal, he still has the immunity idol, he still has his girlfriend with him, and he’s still borderline-immortal in water challenges.  This is why he’s a power player now, but it also may be why he’s voted out after the merge.
3. Amanda-Anyone who catches a 4-foot shark automatically gets a top-3 spot in the rankings.  How cool was that?
4. Tracy-Have you ever gone into a movie with low expectations, only to be pleasantly surprised?  That’s kind of how I feel about Tracy.  She’s very smart and holds her own physically.  I wonder if she’ll ask Cirie to turn on Ozzy and Amanda.
5. Ami-This ranking is more on potential than anything she’s actually done.  She’s laying low right now, but I think she’s tight with Tracy and Chet.  If they all team up with Cirie and get rid of Ozzy or Amanda, she could be in a very happy place.
6. James-James and Parvati are still tight with Ozzy and Amanda.  The reason they’re a little lower is because it looks like Ozzy is calling the shots.
7. Parvati-In the same situation as James.  She’s one spot lower because she’s the likely the first victim if the rest of the gang decide to break up the “love alliance”.
8. Eliza-The tribe shuffle helped her more than almost anyone else.  Now she has 4 fans in her tribe that she can befriend and then stab in the back.
9. Chet-No, that’s not a misprint.  He’s made the rankings.  Anyone who dodges bullets the last two weeks like he has obviously has a guardian angel.  Or maybe it’s Tracy and Cirie.  Either way he has friends, and a physical non-threat like Chet could go far if he makes it to the merge.
10. Natalie-Another cheap, selfish attempt to convince myself that I have a chance to win my office Survivor pool.  Hey-she is the captain of the tribe that won immunity last week!  Go Natalie!

Tune in again Wednesday for a preview of this week’s action, and again on Friday to find out just how wrong I was with these rankings!  May the tribe speak clearly to you!