Reality TV

Boy, is there ever a lot of ground to cover from Monday’s episode of The Bachelor!  There were two individual dates, one group date, a rose ceremony where the final four would be decided and….(wait for it)….the most shocking fight is The Bachelor history!!!. 

Matt and the girls went to Sun Valley, Idaho for a “winter wonderland” themed show.  Chelesa got the first individual date, which was a romantic sleigh ride through the valley.  The most interesting thing about this date was…. 

                 Hi, there!  Can I steal you away from these people for a minute?

                 Robin?  What are you doing in my blog?

                 I just want to have some one-on-one time with you.    

                 I’m in the middle of a recap here!  These people want to          know what happened on the show last week.  I can’t just leave them-that would be rude!  You’ll just have to wait your turn! 

Sorry about that, folks.  As I was saying, the interesting thing was learning that Chelsea has very uncomfortable with public displays of affection.  She wouldn’t even let Matt hold her hand during the carriage ride!  After seeing a very athletic, aggressive, confident Chelsea throughout the series, this revelation really surprised me.  It’s sort of like hearing that Steve Irwin was afraid of cats.  As the date went on, Chelsea knew that Matt was a little concerned.  Proving she can be romantic, she “created” her own invitation to an overnight room and invited Matt to join her.  Nobody ever accused Matt of being stupid.  He said yes, and the cameras focused on them making out yet again while they faded to commercial.  Stay tuned, though, for the most shocking fight in The Bachelor history!!!. 

Individual date number two could have been re-named Noelle’s Last Chance.  A one-on-one date was just what the doctor ordered for Noelle, who knew going in that she had to “step up her game” for her to have a chance.  Matt and Noelle stumbled and bumbled while they were ice skating, but the date itself looked to go very smoothly.  Noelle took Matt’s advice from earlier in the week and opened herself up a bit, and as a result…. 

          As a result you’re spending all your time with your readers instead of little old me!

          Robin, have you heard that expression about guests and fish starting to smell in three days?

          Well, duh!  Do I look like Ashlee??

          Why don’t you have a seat over there and think about that while I go on here. 

Sorry, folks.  Where was I?  Oh, yes!  As a result of Noelle opening up more to Matt, she’s gone from pretender to contender.  That one on one date clinched her spot in the final four.  Stick with me, folks…we’re getting closer to the most shocking fight in The Bachelor history!!!. 

The group date was a ski trip for Marshana, Shayne, Amanda and Robin.  The shocking aspects of this date were seeing Shayne pull more makeup out of her ski jacket than Estee Lauder, Amanda not meeping even once despite never skiing before and….. 

                    Aren’t you finished with this yet?  I would really like to steal you              away for some one-on-one time.

                    I know the reader is probably asking the same question, Robin, but you can’t keep interrupting me like this!  No wonder you didn’t get a rose Monday night! 

What was that other shocking aspect?  Oh, yeah….Robin interrupted Shayne’s one on one time with Matt.  Okay, that’s less than shocking.  What else was less than shocking?  Well, Marshana could not ski and was more concerned with looking good in her outfit and Matt had another make-out session on the slopes with Shayne.  

Okay…you’ve waited through lots of my drivel to get to this point….the most shocking fight in The Bachelor history!!!.  It turns out that Chelsea said that Marshana is as negative at 5 minus 7, which is pretty much right.  Marshana yelled at Chelsea and told her to walk away.  Chelsea did.  Marshana followed her and yelled at her for a minute or two, saying she was not negative.  The end.  That’s the most shocking fight in The Bachelor’s history?  That’s what ABC has been promoting for the last week?  Talk about a let-down!  Who’s the most beautiful woman in the world?  Janet Reno?  Who’s the best actor in the history of film?  Freddie Prinze Jr? From now on, ABC, cut down on the hyperbole. 

Going into the show, the only suspense for me had to do with the fourth rose.  I knew that barring something disastrous that Shayne, Amanda and Chelsea were shoo-ins.  Before the show started I thought Robin was the favourite for the fourth rose….. 

              Of course, I should have got a rose!  Matt likes me!  He really, really likes me!  I just need some more one on one time to convince him!

               All you need is to get out of this game and this thread, Robin.  Bon Soir! 

Noelle’s one on one date was enough to put her over the top.  She’s in the final four, while Robin and Marshana left empty handed.   

Next week should be interesting-Matt goes on four “hometown” dates to meet the families of his final four.  Tune in again later this week for another round of previews, power rankings and recaps.  In the meantime, make sure you stop and smell the roses!